okay. this has got to be the ugliest car available in North America since the Pontiac Aztek seared our corneas. if cars are capable of being sick then the Nissan Cube’s got leprosy, lupus and elephant man syndrome but let’s get beyond the looks, shall we?

i can’t. i can’t get over how terrible this car looks. its awful from every angle in every aspect from its horrifyingly asymmetrical windows to its queasy raccoon eyes. the only thing i like about the body is GAH! LYING IS A SIN!

in the midst of manufacturing a sea of crappy, ho-hum cars, somebody at GM had the bright idea for the Chevy El Camino: a crappy, ho-hum car with a bizarre pickup bed. amazingly, the El Camino saw production over a span of 28 years, winning the automotive special olympics by trumping main rival the Ford Ranchero which only lasted for 22.

American cars have had a long, rich history of terrible ideas and misguided attempts and it seems to be business as usual with the El Camino. of course, this was also the fault of the average American consumer who wanted enormous road-going barges powered by ridiculously inefficient engines.

still better than driving around in snobmobiles like the Toyota Prius, i guess.

Ferrari recently released images of the new 458 Italia and i feel like i should be excited about them but i’m not; i think it looks terrible. in fact, when i first saw them, i thought they were quick renders done by some sort of Norwegian design student. let me show you what i mean.

1) what appear to be intake vents for the hood come off as “angry eyebrows” and transform the overall shape of the headlight into that of a perilously sharp sock puppet.

2) the garish front air dam looks like an afterthought and the overall feel of the front bumper reminds me of a mid ’90s Japanese economy car.

3) the positioning of the taillights over the rear vents make it look very awkward. it looks almost as if they removed a set of conventional taillight clusters, covered the empty space with gutter grating and then slapped on some spare Enzo taillights they had laying around.

4) i think i’m right in saying that there has never been a production car with three exhaust pipes. do you know why? because only five year-olds would put three exhaust pipes on a car. it looks absolutely awful.

what happened, Ferrari?